Friends???

Recently I removed over 260 of my Facebook "friends" in order to reduce the list to the people I have contacted over the last year or so and am strongly connected to in one way or another. I didn't start out trying to get a large group of friends as some way of feeling good about myself. My friends list expanded mainly because I attempted to put on an all class reunion for my high school and it evolved into me adding those that I talked to about the reunion. The reunion didn't pan out, but I kept these "friends" still on my list. I must admit that at times seeing 338 people listed felt kind of cool, but then I thought who are all these people? Many of them I am sure are very nice, but I could not tell you one thing about them. It became tedious having to create groups so I could see what was happening with the people I really knew and thus truly wanted to know what they were doing. I can't tell you how much better it feels. It is like a little weight off my back. Pretty much nobody that is off my list commented on any of my postings as they probably have large lists themselves and I clearly was not a priority. This is completely fine as I don't need affirmation from near strangers to know that I am okay. I've got 76 true connections right now that I can better keep up with. Also, I have my parents, sister, fiancee, and my daughter who when she gives me a hug makes everything seem alright.

Silliness

When I think of silliness I think of this:






One of the biggest gifts of parenting is silliness. My best times with my daughter are when we are goofy together. I love hearing her say "You are a silly daddy." I have to admit that I love hearing anything from her mouth except for the occasional whine about not getting her way.

I wasn't very good at being silly during my childhood. I was so concerned about what others thought of me and not getting into trouble that I took things way too seriously. This is due to a variety of reasons, but mostly I was just a very nervous child with way too low self esteem.

What is silliness to me? Well, let me start out with what is not. It's not about throwing a pie in someone's face or bonking them on the head like in The Three Stooges. These are silly, but not the kind of silly I enjoy. Silliness for me is getting on a jungle gym and pretending my daughter is driving us to Disneyland. She buckles me in and off we go. It is also when she bakes me a cake out of sand with rocks for candles for my "birthday" and she gets her other little friends to sing me happy birthday. This is of course after she puts the sand cake into the oven which is located in the open next to the nearest tree. More silliness occurs when we play soccer in which she is the coach and I am the kid. I have more fun being the kid with her then I ever was as a kid myself.

Life has struggles all around us, but what makes them worthwhile is knowing that we can be silly every once in a while. Maybe, we can be silly more often then that if we let ourselves be and let others, too. Whatever your belief system says; we are all unique. This uniqueness allows us to be silly in our own way. If you are around a group of young children some day, look at them and see how they act when given the opportunity to be creative and themselves. Their eyes sparkle if given an instrument, some paints, or just running around playing their own reindeer games.

Every time I get down and sad I think of my daughter's smile and the fact I am blessed with a constant reminder that it is okay to be silly. Unfortunately as a divorced parent I don't see her nearly as much as I wish I did, but I keep a rock in my pocket which reminds me that my silly girl is always with me. I could tell her to get serious, but that just seems silly.